2015 wrap up

Semester break has finally come and it is exactly on the new year season. 2015 hit me hard in the head, literally. 

I had an accident and got 2 scar from in. ON MY HEAD hahaha. Well, I’m not sure why, but I’m somehow happy for that. The feeling of satisfied on doing something although am not sure what. It’s either having accident (well, obviously not) or how I handle everything well enough. I’m bleeding at that time and everyone said that I almost look like a ghost, you know those blooded ghost on the set. But, I calmly come to my sense and sit. And the medic quickly did something to my head and I was all set up for my further treatment. Wanna pat myself for a job well done. You have done it maturely. Hahaha. 

Komander work make a hard time for me too. But, choosing between quit or continue this work, I rather continue and have all the hard time. I have all the friends and help I can possibly get. As for me being an introvert make everything hard, but with this, having a bigger circle of friends is not impossible. And then, all the experience of being a komander. MasyaAllah. If you ever be in my shoes and see it in the bigger picture, you would understand. Seniors helped me so much. I always wanted sisters that protect and been there for you. Other than my family. Even your family sometimes cannot help you. I’m so grateful for that. Also, every knowledge I ever get here, I’m so thankful for that. Because we never ever get a manual to be good on something, not without experience. Although I ever had a very hard time, I will try to see the silver lining behind all the clouds, surely.

For my classmates. I don’t know if this will be permanent, but I pray for the No’s. They are likely to be drifting their selves away. I’m not sure whether I’m just being paranoid or it’s a fact. Everyone’s denial sounds like agreeing. We’re no longer have the same classes but only a few people though. Perhaps, everything are simply misunderstanding. But even if they ever misunderstood and get angry at each other, how to get to the way we were? One misunderstanding leads more of that. Now, everything seems so awkward. I always make fun of myself and ask dumb questions. So they will react with each other and laugh just like old times. But, there’s no longer reaction. They literally ignore me. I looked pathetic and I’m afraid that I’ll stop trying and no longer care. Well, I just hope it’s not as bad as I think. And for guys, everything seems okay for me, perhaps. Is it impossible for one to be close friends even with not seeing each other everyday? 

I hope we have a prosperity life ahead and may our hardships and mistakes be just the boundary for our success